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Trying after forty


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#1 Jackie

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Posted 14 July 2013 - 01:22 PM

I’ve been trying to get pregnant for the last three years, but to no avail. I’m in my early forties and I am still healthy so there really should be no reason, or is there? I had my last child thirteen years ago but I have been off birth control for seven years. It’s really frustrating because I’m not getting any younger. What could I be doing wrong?

#2 Cinco

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Posted 14 July 2013 - 02:02 PM

Jackie, have you considered that maybe it isn't you? Maybe it's your husband. I am not trying to point fingers, so please don't take offense! Maybe it wouldn't hurt for both of you to undergo some fertility tests.

Best of luck!

#3 RainbowBrite

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Posted 14 July 2013 - 03:30 PM

I agree, it could be either of you who is the problem. Get it checked out. I personally wouldn't want to give birth in my forties simply because I want to be young enough to enjoy my children.

#4 Emma

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Posted 16 July 2013 - 07:57 AM

Cinco and RainbowBrite could be right, Jackie. Another factor could be your frame of mind. You obviously want this so much that you are under a lot of stress. I’ve heard that stress causes a hostile environment which reduces the chances of conception. Work on relaxation techniques as you act on the advice given by our advanced members. I wish you peace and success.

#5 Jeyne

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Posted 16 July 2013 - 08:53 AM

Jackie, have you undergone a physical recently? There are a lot of reproductive health issues that could be giving you problems, PCOS being one of the most common. When was the last time you visited your OB-GYN?

#6 Jackie

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Posted 21 July 2013 - 02:22 PM

To be honest, I had never considered that the problem might be with him and not me. I visit my OB-GYN regularly and my next appointment is next month. My husband wants this baby as much as I do so I hope getting him to agree to a test won't be too difficult.

#7 Dolce

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Posted 16 August 2013 - 04:03 AM

View PostRainbowBrite, on 14 July 2013 - 03:30 PM, said:

I agree, it could be either of you who is the problem. Get it checked out. I personally wouldn't want to give birth in my forties simply because I want to be young enough to enjoy my children.

As a woman in her late 30s and looking to conceive for the first time I can see what you mean, as many people in this age group are starting to feel the effects of ageing. On the other hand those of us who haven't had children have had the opportunity and time to live a more relaxing lifestyle. If I have a baby in the next couple of years I think I will do okay.

#8 Cody Taylor

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Posted 04 March 2014 - 03:33 AM

I agree with Dolce point of view, expecting first baby after crossing 30's sometimes becomes a difficult ask for many. But it is not meant to demotivate you but my dear you to need understand human complicacy before blaming anyone in 40's. As carrying out test on physical ability of both of you can further enhance your idea.

#9 Cody Taylor

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Posted 04 March 2014 - 03:33 AM

I agree with Dolce point of view, expecting first baby after crossing 30's sometimes becomes a difficult ask for many. But it is not meant to demotivate you but my dear you to need understand human complicacy before blaming anyone in 40's. As carrying out test on physical ability of both of you can further enhance your idea.

#10 Micha

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Posted 02 July 2014 - 11:49 PM

I really recommend you and your husband visit your doctor and have a long talk with them, there are higher risks of getting pregnant after 40 and since it's not working for you, you'll need a doctor to walk you through the steps. You might need a fertility treatment or preconception counselling.




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